I just saw a commercial that quotes a review that called Twilight "the most romantic movie of the year."

What was this writer thinking? Seriously? Since when are stalking and staring creepily and looking like you're always in pain romantic? Exactly, THEY'RE NOT.

The most romantic movie of the year was, obviously, Bright Star.

Love, love, LOVE this coat from eshakti.com. Why don't I have more money?!

I'll accept your donations. Thank you.

50 Cent has written an autobiography. I want it.

Why does Bing taunt me?

I was sitting in my basement with ice cold toes, when I decided to see what Bing! brought up as its background today. I don't use Bing!, it's not the best search engine around, but I do like the background photo feature they use with links to interesting info about the photo. Check it out sometime, it's interesting. Anyways, this is what the first link I found said:




I added the highlights. Just so you wouldn't be confused. Yeah, I'm sweet. Right now my spell-checker is telling me I mis-spelled wouldn't. But I know I didn't. Maybe it's not a word. Oh no it flagged didn't too. Maybe it's a contraction thing. ANYWAYS, Bing! wants to make me suffer. Why else would it taunt me with a vacation to la Republica Dominicana when it knows I can't afford it.

I never understand this duvet cover from Ikea. I guess they're hoping to grab the coveted "I want all my bedlinens to have stylized pictures of pajamas on them" demographic. As far as i'm concerned, they can have it.

Yes I spend too much time browsing Ikea's website. Don't judge me.

Maybe I have a celebrity crush on Craig Ferguson. Maybe it has something to do with the fact that he has a revolutionary war "JOIN or DIE" tattoo. If you're going to get a tattoo, that's a pretty good way to go. What's more hardcore than the revolution? That's right, nothing. I'd like to insert a shout out to John Adams here. Word.



And he's Scottish.

And one day, instead of his regular monologue, he did this.

Movie update!

Movies I've watched recently:


I don't think I've seen a more utterly delightful movie in recent years. It was (to list a few things) hilarious, heart-breaking, heart-felt, real, wonderful, hopeful, and a really really good use of my time. I recommend it to everyone I know, because I know that you will love it. Think Juno but not disgusting and way more positive. Not that Juno wasn't positive, because it had its moments, but mostly it was kind of meh. Definitely definitely watch Whip It



I'm still not entirely sure what to say about this movie. Not that I don't like it, because I do. A lot. I love it actually. But (a warning) it's not at all a piece of carefree period fluff. Bright Star tells the story of famous Romantic poet John Keats, and his fiance, Fanny Brawne. They meet when Keats is renting rooms from a Brawne family friend, and her concern for his sick brother draws them together. Their relationship anchors her, giving weight and importance to a life obsessed with fashion and flirting. It does the same for him, lifting him from a deep depression, and fueling not only his writing, but his will to live. He, unfortunately, is deep in debt and has no income to speak of, and so the two are unable to marry. He and others try to push Fanny to move on and find someone else, but she refuses to do so. They wait for three years, he contracts tuberculosis, travels to Italy for the warmer climate at the urging of his friends, and dies alone. This is not an unfamiliar story, but the way it's told is very unusual. There is nothing revolutionary about this film, what makes it exceptional is the painstaking craftsmanship that went into making it. John Keats and Fanny Brawne are not stereotypical characters locked in an ill-fated romance working towards a storybook ending. You come to know them intimately, you see them change, you know their backstory, you understand the outside forces acting on them, and you are allowed to know them in a way which few films permit. This understanding and empathy with them makes their story more personal and more powerful. It is careful, quiet, and utterly beautiful.



FAME (picture malfunction...I'm too lazy to replace it.)
It was a movie about a performing arts high school. Nothing that new or original. It was better then the first one, if only for the fact that this was rated PG while the original was R. Yeah, I'll download some of the songs, but I don't think I'll ever watch it again. It was fluff and fulfilled my entertainment needs at the time.




First of all, what a creepy poster. Second of all, Bruce Willis' surrogate looks really creepy. Lastly, it was better than Push but not as good as, say, the first Transformers. So good but not great. What I found most interesting was the commentary on how technology changes people's lives. The society in this movie had become completely insular. They stayed at home all the time, and never left as themselves. I think we see a measure of that today with the modern conveniences we enjoy. The point- please leave your house at least once a day, and don't ever have more aquaintances or friends online than you have in real life.

And yes, I just turned that silly movie ino a warning on how not to live your life. So there.




Meh. Some thoughts:
1. Adam Rodriguez is a VERY attractive man
2. Gladys Knight!!!
3. Taraji P. Henson was not anywhere near as good as I expected her to be (straight off of winning an Oscar for a 10-minute performance and all). But that's mostly the script's fault.
4. Madea gives the BEST summary of the bible I have ever heard. When I find a good clip, I'll post it.
5. Other than those things, this movie is complete crap. Good intentions poorly realized.
6. Did I mention Adam Rodriguez? 'Cause wow.



ALL ABOUT STEVE
Sandra Bullock is too old to play this character. I'm sorry, I really like her, but it's true. She just is. That being said, she's kind of sweet and sad (when she's not creepy and over-trusting). Probably don't waste your time, it's a little heavy on the awkward moments and just not that satisfying to watch. And her boots, the red boots she wears constantly, look like she bought them at a fetish shop an a seedy side street in downtown L.A. Not cute.




I'm really glad I decided to write this if only so that I could find this poster. I like it that much. Yes, this just started playing at the dollar theater in Chattanooga. Which, let me complain for a moment, is not actually a dollar theater, but a "$3 for matinees and heaven only knows how much for an evening" theater. Anyways, it was just as good as the first time. The scene in the cave, when Dumbledore creates the giant swirling fire hurricane is...awesome. That is all.

So everybody (hopefully) knows about Kanye West's shameful moment of shame at the VMAs last week. Well apparently, he posted an apology on his blog right after that happened, you can read about it here. What is most ridiculous is that, not only did he mock her in the apology (talking about how he really likes her lyrics about "being a cheerleader, and she's in the bleachers" do we really think he was sincerely praising her there?) but the apology apparently was only up for...a day, if that. It's been removed from the blog.


see more Fail Blog

An Epiphany

Well, I think I've figured out what exactly it was that drove Tom Cruise insane. I am almost positive it was filming "Interview with a Vampire," because that movie is so effing insane I don't even have words for it. Tom Cruise in it is...evil, crazy-go-nuts, and has so much hair. He probably has more hair than I've ever had in my whole entire life. Actually no, that much hair has probably grown from my head. But I can't compete with Antonio Banderas. It's so highly teased too. Why would vampires tease their hair? Antonio Banderas has a giant, woolly blanket of ratted hair. There's probably blood matted in it too. And...the vampire baby that is Kirsten Dunst. No, Stephanie Meyer did not make up hungry vampire babies. There are so many things that are just wrong and creepy and....sigh. Just don't watch it. Unless you ARE a vampire. In that case you would probably find it interesting and true to life.

I'm writing this as I watch the end of this movie, and there are so many things that I want to say about it, but I don't think you want to hear about Brad Pitt's crazy contacts, and the way that he burns all the other vampires ...alive? and cuts them to pieces with a giant scythe. How appropriate.

Done.

OMG.

To quote a very wise young man, "Why is this happening to me?! Is this real life???"

Please, visit this website to find out why I am SO concerned. And it's a very real, appalled and stunned kind of concerned. Not fake concern.

REALLY quickly because it is SO my bedtime; I was just looking at my i-tunes and it showed me the top albums right now, one of which is the jonas brothers new album? The title of this album is "Lines, Vines, and Trying Times." Do they really expect me to believe that ISN'T a drug/alcohol reference and allow my hypothetical (read: non-existent) children listen to that album? SERIOUSLY? Seriously. Good night.

Tennessee it is!

So I just filled out my acceptance form for UT-K. And I'm getting excited. I have a feeling the program is going to be different than my ideas and expectations, but I'm open to change. Also, I originally wanted to do a more library-focused program, but the more I think about it, the more a digital library/database focused program seems completely practical. More opportunities in the real world, and I may have the opportunity to intern at Oak Ridge national lab (think Manhattan project and enriching Uranium). I'm not sure though; I may end up doing something that combines the two and gives me maximum choices. But I'm really getting excited. Mostly to be done and on the other side, but also to be in school again. Not that it's been that long since I got out...but yeah. And the campus is beautiful! In downtown Knoxville on the banks of the Tennessee river, lots of deep red brick classical gothic style buildings, a nice effort of matching new construction to the old (not like BYU...however much I love it, none of the buildings really...well, go). and I'll be attending a school that has 1) an awesome football team (which will be a big change...sorry cougars, you haven't really cut it since the mid-80s.), and 2) a spring break! Me...on spring-break? Crazy, right?

My biggest concern right now is whether they will classify me as a resident for tuition purposes. Because right now they haven't. Which could be expensive. I'm sending in my appeal tomorrow. Keep your fingers crossed.

Don't get me wrong, this movie does look entertaining. But have any of you actually ever read any of the Sherlock Holmes stories? Because this movie is the complete opposite of everything that Doyle created Homes to be. And I'm offended for his sake. But I'll still watch it. But know that I'll be wincing inwardly throughout. I always used to have a fictional character crush on Sherlock Holmes. The old Holmes. Not the RD, Jr. version.

And Jude Law as Watson? At least he found a part that works with his receding hairline and allows him to continue his recent trend of not bathing.

American Idol

I know this is ridiculous, because there's no way on earth that this would ever be an issue; nevertheless, I will say it. Everytime I watch American Idol, I'm so glad that I'm not a contestant for the simple reason that I could NEVER (EVER) keep a straight face while listening to Paula Abdul comment on my performance. I am so grateful. She is a nutcase and a half.



On a side note, I've been admitted to three grad schools now- Pratt, Catholic, and Tennessee. I'll probably end up going to TN even though I haven't heard back from two schools yet because I wont hear back until January and the more I think about it, the more I fancy the idea of going to TN, paying cheap tuition, living at home for free (however loserly and lonesome it might be, it's cheap), attending a school that's ranked higher than both Pratt and Catholic, and starting now instead of deferring for a year to earn money and finishing more quickly. There are so many things about it that recommend that plan to me over any other. I'm still not 100% percent sure that's what I want to do (the lure of Maryland is pretty strong, but it's still an unkown. An expensive one.) but I'll pray about it and let y'all know. That's right. I said it. Y'all. What can I say, I'm in Tennessee right now and it's getting to me.

Ode to Stairs

7
10
20
17
10

11
15


The sequences of steps behind the RB.
Yes I have been running up them, late every day for much too long.

Sometimes two at a time,

Sometimes singly,

Sometimes not running at all but carefully,

wearily,

plodding my way to class.

But that only when I was on time.

Which was rarely.
Today we met for maybe the last time.

And I won.

Goodbye suffocating steps.
I will miss you.

Maybe.

What I'm about to complain about well probably seem trivial to you. But I don't care. I. Am. Livid. Tonight I got home after waliking around in the rain and after putting on some clean warm clothes, I thought, "now I'll watch a movie and whiten my teeth and it will be awesome." Exactly those words. To myself. In my head. So I go, pull out my whitening trays, and go to look for the rest of my tooth whitening system that I got from my dentist that cost several hundred dollars. Where was it? NO WHERE TO BE FOUND. Not after I pulled everything out of the fridge (where it had been stored). And every other cabinet (even if I had found it in one of them it would have been useless to me. Because it needs to be refrigerated. Obviously). And this means that the last person who cleaned out the fridge threw it away. Now, a tooth whitening system is not that important. I am the first and firmest person to admit that. But the cost IS important. Do I have that much money to throw down on a replacement? NO. OF COURSE I DON'T. The other, and the main reason this upsets me so much is that it is indicative of a blatant disrespect for anything that does not belong to YOU. If it isn't yours, don't touch it. That was simple. Wasn't it? If you have to touch it, put it back exactly where you found. Or in the general vicinity. Or at least on the same floor, I'm not really that picky. Don't leave other people's things laying around on the floor. SHOW RESPECT. I could not be more angry right now. I basically just lost control in front of Melanie about this because she was sitting downstairs while I was looking and witnessed my anger.

Oh hey [un-named roomate], sorry I took your insulin out of the fridge and stepped on it on accident because it was sitting on the floor. Because that's where I left it. Because it's not mine, so what do I really care what happens to it? So you're out now. Oh what, that was all you had? Oh sorry, you shouldn't have left it sitting in the fridge for so long.

A quick update

In reference to my last post, said sweet polish woman took the family's baby and told th nanny she would take care of it because nanny girl was freaking out. So poland buried the baby in her backyard, but some men came to install some piping in her yard and she tried to stop them but couldn't so they found the baby and arrested her and sentenced her to DEATH! And they wouldn't believe the nanny when she told them the truth, they just thought se was crazed with grief. So that wonderful old lady who only ever wanted to help people DIED because the nanny was to frightened to do the right thing. RIDICULOUS.

A Word of Advice

Lets say you're a nanny in a rich family in London in 1902. Actually, you're not a nanny, you're the nanny's assistant. And the head nanny is crazy go nuts. Lock the kids in their rooms all day, drugs the baby so he won't cry, etc... One night, you wake up and the baby is dead. Really sad. But the head nanny freaks out because she's already had one of the kids die on her watch. So when she goes to tell the family, she doesn't actually tell them, she just babbles a lot of random nonsense, runs back to her room, grabs her stuff and bolts. So you're left with a dead baby, the family doesn't know, and actually the parents are in India, the only family at home is the niece of the parents. So the little boy comes to you and tells you you should bring your baby (because you have one, and he's staying with this Polish lady on the other side of town and your family can't know that you have a baby because...scandal!) and substitute it for the other baby who has now passed on. NOW. That was complicated. But if a 6 year old boy suggested this crazy scheme to you, would you actually do it? NO! Of course not! What in the world was this girl thinking? Ok, now watch Berkeley Square, a British miniseries about nannies in turn of the century London.

And when the really sweet old polish lady tries to talk some sense into you and tells you that you can't just substitute one baby for another, LISTEN TO HER!!!!!! Please.

So My cousin Kristin came over tonight just to hang out and watch American Idol. This might not sound that amazing to you, but it is to me. For the following reason: My dad was in the Army for 25 years. We (my brothers and I) did not grow up around our extended family. Ever. We might have spent a week together here and a few days there, but never more than that. And most of that was when we lived in WA. Which we left when I was barely 8. So I have cousins, etc..., I love them, I've always wanted to spend more time with them, but we've never been able to. And my mom's family has been very...divided...since I can remember, so there was never a lot of incentive for the adults to spend the time together. Anyways, Kristin got married in November, and has been living in southwest Provo. But we still haven't hung out. Until now. And it was awesome! We have a family! I knew that already, but...I mean...they haven't really been a part of my life before. Not in a tangible way. Anyways, we had fun. And she set Craig up on a date. Which led to the best phone call I've ever witnessed...etc...

Going to St. George this weekend. Last time I went (back in June) was one of the best mini-holidays of my life. Relaxing, fun, spontaneous...wonderful. So we're going back!

I'm applying to grad schools but it stresses me out too much right now to actually talk about it. give it a couple of weeks.

Bored.

So I just started reading Brisingr, the third installment in Cristopher Paolini's cracked out "Inheritance Trilogy."

Yes, I have a penchant for silly fantasy books, and a weird compulsive aspect to my personality that demands that I finish every book I begin, no matter how terrible. In this case, that also extends to subsequent books in a series.

Anyways, my first complaint is that the book is much to large. I don't need 748 pages of Tolkien larceny. Mostly because it doesn't fit very well in my bag. It fits so poorly, in fact, that when I'm carrying it on my shoulder, the book stabs my shoulder blade. and no alternate arrangement of purse contents alleviates the pain.

Secondly, "grimstnzborith" is not a word, nor is it feasible as a word in any made up language. Ever. You are not Tolkien (who is still recognized as the pre-eminent linguist and philologist of his day) so stop trying to be.

And my last complaint- I've only made it through the first 5 pages so far...but there's something horribly Chronicles of Riddick about the opening pages (i.e. people who mutilate themselves as an act of worship...to some crazy, dark being). It's creepy. And still not even written well at all. I think one of the things that has kept me reading this series was the hope that as he aged, Paolini's writing would as well- become more mature, and much more subtle. Alas, it has not happened. I still feel as though I'm reading a fanfic by some 15 year old obsessed with Robert Jordan, Raymond E. Feist, and Tad Williams. And Tolkien. Ostensibly.

Confessions of a Shopaholic= Ridiculous and wonderful.
The International= Actually quite good- better than similar movies I've seen recently.

Kristin, come back to work.

Is it wrong that I could care less about politics right now? I know it is, I shouldn't even ask. But there are so many things that are more immediate and pressing at this point in my life. So yes, judge me for being apathetic. I'll be an activist tomorrow.

It's been a long time, but I'm back!

First off-- Oversized button up shirt+black leggings that don't match+wannabe Burberry plaid rainboots with faded pictures of dogs= NOT AN OUTFIT!

Secondly, mustaches are neither suave nor debonair. Nor are they attractive, cute, ironic, funny, or kosher in any way. Stop already.

Third, one of the things that makes me the most angry in the world is changed plans. Ex: I make a plan with someone to do something a few days from now, I'm going to make time to fill that plan, and I expect the same courtesy from the other person(s) involved. If you're not going to be able to do it, tell me beforehand. You won't hurt my feelings, and I'll find something else worthwhile to do. Another example: I make plans with someone, and they change them at the last minute without telling me. Is it really that hard to make a phone call or send me a text? Again, you won't hurt my feelings, and I'll be able to plan accordingly. Really, all this boils down to is that I simply want others to give me the same consideration I would give them in the same situation.

Fourth, Guatemala is not as dangerous as you think it is, and France may conceal hidden dangers under a congenial surface.

Taken= Good, if a bit on the violent side.
Inkheart= Enjoyable. Andy Serkis is my idol.
Underworld 3= Utter crap, waste of my time like the other 2.
He's Just Not That Into You= Funny, painfully awkward, but in an entertaining (but still very very painful) way.
Push= Weird, action-y, too sci-fi-ey. Meh.
New In Town= Cute! A rom-com rated PG! What a relief!
Bride Wars= Horrible.
The Tale of Deseperaux= Actually quite good. Great animation, goofy plot about soup.
Australia= I think I've already made it quite clear how I feel about this. That is, crap saved by H.J.
Twilight= Sigh
Benjamin Button= Much too long, too much sex, not remotely relatable to reality. Amazing, flawless CGI.